Oi, That's MY Body....
Sometimes I write about general things, sometimes I write about more personal stuff. This time I'm going to share something very personal. You can believe it, or not it's ultimately your choice. It's also ultimately my truth and will always remain as such.
I've been brought up a Roman Catholic. I've done the whole christening, communion, confirmation etc thing. I think my parents believed it was the right thing to do, even though as it turned out the practitioners of the catholic church had questionable motives. Anyway we did the whole prayer, afterlife, mortal sin thing. As I grew older I questioned their beliefs and started to form my own opinions. Having kids of my own, I always gave them the choice of what they wanted to believe and they made their own choices regarding the big events. Though I think the tradition of getting loads of money was a major factor. Do I believe in an after life? I'm not sure.And as there is only one way of knowing for sure And I've no plans to go down that road I guess I'll have to wait and see. All I know is what I experienced. Do I believe in God? Not really. I do believe things happen for a reason, and I do believe in fate. I also believe it's possible to change our fate. Anyway........
Life continued on, and things happened and I found myself gravely ill and in need of major surgeries. Not exactly a life or death situation or so I thought.
Of course I was nervous, everyone is when they're due surgery, but I was quite positive. I went through all the usual procedures and was ready to have a lovely sleep. I remember being on the table and slowly drifting off. I was having lots of different dreams, moving from one to the next, until I found myself standing in the corner of an operating theatre watching someone having surgery. It was a woman and things weren't going too well. She seemed to have stopped breathing and the medical team were working hard to try and rectify it. In spite of the panic they felt I felt calm and happy. Serene almost. I was curious though. I moved closer to have a look. I recognised the lady on the table. She was small, brown hair, blue eyes. That lady was me. I stood for a few seconds, watching what they were doing. I liked this peaceful feeling, I wanted it to last forever. I also wanted to be with my kids. And my family. A choice had to be made. At that point I remember a huge intake of breath, and I sat up bolt upright on the table and tried to take out all tubes etc. Copious amounts of coughing and vomiting followed. I was on oxygen for quite some time afterwards too.
So when the morphine haze lifted and I started to remember things, it all came back to me. Was it a lucid dream? Was it an out of body experience? I really can't say. The doctors confirmed that I had in fact stopped breathing for a while and they had to work hard to start it again. All I know is that it changed me. It changed my outlook on life. It changed the way I think about stuff. It changed the way I think about me. So it's up to you to make your own mind up, all I can say is I'm lucky to be here to tell the tale. And you people are lucky to hear it!
SharonAnn
I've been brought up a Roman Catholic. I've done the whole christening, communion, confirmation etc thing. I think my parents believed it was the right thing to do, even though as it turned out the practitioners of the catholic church had questionable motives. Anyway we did the whole prayer, afterlife, mortal sin thing. As I grew older I questioned their beliefs and started to form my own opinions. Having kids of my own, I always gave them the choice of what they wanted to believe and they made their own choices regarding the big events. Though I think the tradition of getting loads of money was a major factor. Do I believe in an after life? I'm not sure.And as there is only one way of knowing for sure And I've no plans to go down that road I guess I'll have to wait and see. All I know is what I experienced. Do I believe in God? Not really. I do believe things happen for a reason, and I do believe in fate. I also believe it's possible to change our fate. Anyway........
Life continued on, and things happened and I found myself gravely ill and in need of major surgeries. Not exactly a life or death situation or so I thought.
Of course I was nervous, everyone is when they're due surgery, but I was quite positive. I went through all the usual procedures and was ready to have a lovely sleep. I remember being on the table and slowly drifting off. I was having lots of different dreams, moving from one to the next, until I found myself standing in the corner of an operating theatre watching someone having surgery. It was a woman and things weren't going too well. She seemed to have stopped breathing and the medical team were working hard to try and rectify it. In spite of the panic they felt I felt calm and happy. Serene almost. I was curious though. I moved closer to have a look. I recognised the lady on the table. She was small, brown hair, blue eyes. That lady was me. I stood for a few seconds, watching what they were doing. I liked this peaceful feeling, I wanted it to last forever. I also wanted to be with my kids. And my family. A choice had to be made. At that point I remember a huge intake of breath, and I sat up bolt upright on the table and tried to take out all tubes etc. Copious amounts of coughing and vomiting followed. I was on oxygen for quite some time afterwards too.
So when the morphine haze lifted and I started to remember things, it all came back to me. Was it a lucid dream? Was it an out of body experience? I really can't say. The doctors confirmed that I had in fact stopped breathing for a while and they had to work hard to start it again. All I know is that it changed me. It changed my outlook on life. It changed the way I think about stuff. It changed the way I think about me. So it's up to you to make your own mind up, all I can say is I'm lucky to be here to tell the tale. And you people are lucky to hear it!
SharonAnn
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