Short and Sometimes Sweet

“Imagine  smiling after a slap in the face. Then think of doing it twenty-four hours a day.” Today is a bad bad pain day. A number 10 on the pain scale to be precise. It must be bad because for me to admit to that is huge. I was brought up to be strong, to never let anything get to you, to fight it. To show emotion or admit to being unable to cope was frowned upon. Hard to work out when you’re also blessed with being an empath. Something I’ve only recently discovered about myself. As a child I was taught if you fall down, you get back up no matter what. I don’t use this philosophy with my own children. I know to my cost that it’s counter productive at best. I had three children without any pain relief, and just gritted my teeth and got through it. I got through two clashes with cancer. One whilst pregnant and another where I literally had to be cut in half to fix it. I had never known pain like it. I gritted my teeth and continued to be that “brave soldier”. I wouldn’t recom

Arsenal v Newcastle Emirates Stadium  3pm Sat 16 Dec After limping blindly through our last couple of premier league matches we now face Newcastle at home. This fixture usually sees a lot of drama and this one will be no exception.  Newcastle are having mixed results lately, and are in a kind of limbo regarding ownership. I can’t abide Mike Ashley, his kind of money throwing was the start of the end of football as we know it, and I can only feel a sense of karma served at his situation right now.  Matters off the pitch no doubt effect those on the pitch and the saga continues for the Magpies. I only hope the buyers are decent and hold on to the traditions that a club like Newcastle deserve. Anyway, onto matters on the pitch and the situation with Arsenal.  We are again playing the all possession and no penetration football that seems de rigueur for us at this time of the year.  Our possession of the ball and shots at goal are second to none, but

"Your Illness does not define you, your strength and courage does" Having not blogged on here since April, I felt it was about time for an update. In my defence, I've been very unwell and the last thing on my mind was writing; However, I have remembered my reason for writing my thoughts down and have decided to try to put into words what has been happening thus far. To summarise and refresh, I had a full hysterectomy in 2010. I wasn't quite finished having babies but the need to be around for the ones that do have outweighed the need for that to have more. The nastiness found in the lining of my womb, my kidneys, my bladder, etc confirmed this was the right decision. However, it had already taken it's toll in the way of messing up my immune system and I contracted a very unpleasant dose of sepsis in 2014. I never fully recovered, and after various episodes of passing out, dizziness, unbearable pain, and general confusion I decided to go the the doctor. My

                                                                                                                                               "Wake up and Live" It's been over a year since writing here so I guess I'm overdue! It's been a hell of a year for me and not exactly in a good way either. Where do I begin? As many of you know, in 2014 I ended up with sepsis due to not looking after a simple infection I picked up, and only for the stubbornness of my daughter I again might not be here. The residual effects have been with me since then, and in 2016 they reached their peak. I had blackouts, occasions where I lost the use of my legs, numbness in my limbs and various other symptoms that would fill this blog were I to list them. So off I trot to the GP. He treated me for my muscle jerks, complete lack of balance, and eventually sent me to see a specialist. He also took bloods. These bloods showed up a few things. I have a serious blood disorder.